A client recently came to us and
said, I'm looking to really dial
in my brand messaging, I am
rebranding my website, I want to
make sure my story and my
mission and my brand and my
website are all spot on in order
to attract the people who I
would love to work with. I want
to apply more concern and
empathy into my sales process.
Well, when they said that they
were entering into our story
supply messaging framework, it's
a workshop series and guide that
helps you clarify your brand
messaging, so you know how to
talk about what you do and why
in the most powerful way. So
what I want to show you today
are five essentials you need
inside of your brand messaging
in order for you to stand out
and profit. And for your
customers to feel seen and
heard. There's a video I did
above that talks about them even
further. And what we're going to
do today is actually show you a
real life example of a coaching
session we did with one of our
clients to help them break down
each of these five essentials,
but then use that to guide their
next marketing decisions. In
this specific instance, we were
going to apply it to parts of
the marketing plan, but then how
we scripted their sales messages
in video. And so as you watch
this coaching call, take note
for yourself to be like, okay, I
may not be in the industry of
this type of business. However,
I can apply the same principles
to take the same approach to how
I go to better clarify the words
I use in my messaging to on my
website to on in my videos, any
piece of marketing material, and
then you can go off and further
have confidence and how to
approach your marketing. This is
a messaging workshop, plus,
we're gonna do a quick review of
the launch plan. And so I'll
guide the conversation. But this
is really going to be a lot of
note taking, and just making
sure we're refining your
messaging, because at the end of
this, the goal is to really take
these notes and put that into
the marketing messages, we hope
script and prepare for you. But
also some updates that can go
inside of your website, your
sales page, and even social
media, we're going to start with
talking about just a quick
product market fit, which
basically just means to
understand the type of industry
we're speaking to, there's kind
of three different levels of
markets. So the broad range
market are relationships, other
markets, for example, it's like
health and wealth, but
relationships is the the market
we're in. So within that there's
like a sub market Parent Child
relationships, is that kind of
sub market within relationships
that we're addressing, you can
kind of expand this a little bit
more but calling it your niche.
Would you say is it primarily
toddler to parent relationships,
toddler relationships? Well,
what does that look like you
would say for your niche?
Yeah, I would say Parenting
Toddlers and Preschoolers. Yeah,
I don't even know if I would say
relationships is the market
because I guess when I hear that
I hear like couples counseling.
I hear Gottman and Gottman I
hear marriage I hear spouses.
Whereas I really feel like our
discussion is is around
parenting and supporting
parents, the parent child,
parent child relationship, which
I know we say that but that is
really a parenting. That's part
of parenting language, parenting
so parent child, and then
toddlers and preschoolers. So
our our whole demographic as
parents of children, between the
ages of one and five is one in
five. Okay. Speaking of,
you know, the parents and your
ideal customers, describe them
in for free, like this is all
just like free flowing. Whatever
you guys want to say, Tell us
more about who your ideal person
is. Your ideal parent is what
keeps them up at night. What
annoys them? What type of person
are they? And just kind of
describe their their ultimate
profile of what it looks like?
Do you guys plan to take that?
Or do you want me to
I mean, you could take away your
experience from like your
professional experience. And
then I can tell you like I'm the
exact demographic that someone
would buy this course because it
is how hard it is to become a
toddler parent like you to stay
up at night because it's it
feels so hard during the day.
And it just feels like you're
it's like a constant failure,
failure after failure and you
don't know how to connect with
your child, you don't know how
to talk to them in a way that
they can understand what you're
saying, and you lose your
patience. And you see these
patterns that come up in your
own like triggers in your own
behaviors. And you don't want to
you don't want to be that way
because it's just like, it's
just so hard every day. It just
feels so hard and you don't even
know if you're doing it right.
Like you don't know if what
you're saying is working or not.
And you really just want to show
up for your children like you're
so motivated to be what your
parents weren't for you to
support them in a way and you
don't want to mess them up and
make them you know Have to go
through what you went through.
I would also say it's parents
who are having a challenge with
their child's big feelings with
their child's difficult
emotions. And with the child's
challenging behaviors, parents
who don't understand why their
child is doing what they're
doing. And as a result, the
parent feels that they are
messing up, they are the
problem. And I think Veronica
and sonnet are also tapping into
the importance of it bringing up
things from our own experiences
of being a child, and our own
experiences of being a parent.
So a lot of parents who come to
me to work with me, will say why
I don't understand why spanking
doesn't work. And I don't really
believe that a in a tuned and
gentle approach with the child
could produce a respectful, you
know, wonderful child afterward,
I just think that child would be
spoiled, or would it be
entitled, so parents who I think
are really wanting to raise
wonderful children, but have a
lot of mixed messages around how
to do that,
especially because you have your
parenting partner who says the
discipline means consequences,
like they need to be
disciplined, they need to have
consequences for their actions.
And, you know, like, parents
like us are like dipping into
the fields of like, trying to do
it differently. But we don't
have like a concrete or we don't
feel confident in our abilities,
or have the tools to actually
implement and to follow through
with doing something
differently. Because you also
have to get your partner on
board, and you have to hold that
new ground for you, but you
don't have the tools to do so.
Yeah, I think the partner on
board is a good thing to bring
up in like find getting on the
same page with your partner or,
you know, finding a common
ground to parent from so this
course will help partners, you
know, if you're feeling if the
client is also feeling like, you
know, we just need to find a way
to do this together,
I can also say just from the
demographic of parents that I
work with, they're extremely
stressed, they are so stressed
out, they're stressed out by
everything in their life, and
the children just add an
additional source of stress and
having to parent the children in
a way that society is saying is
the quote, best way to parent,
the child is really draining for
parents. So we've been pushing
up against a lot of what we call
helicopter parenting, where
parents feel like they have to
schedule their child, they have
to schedule everything, they
have to be involved in all of
these important, you know,
activities, so that they can go
to Harvard, they have to go to
the Best PreSchool, so that the
child is prepared for, you know,
the the realities of life, you
know, this is how parents are
made to believe that they have
to raise their child when
they're three years old. And
this is this causes so much
unnecessary stress for parents,
when really our message is quite
simple. Our message is, hey,
focus on regulating yourself,
learn the tools of self
regulation. So the flip side of
that is many parents that I work
with don't actually have self
regulation tools, learn the
tools of self regulation, and
teach your child how to regulate
their body. And from there, we
will have a more we will have
more peace in the home, we will
have less chaos, we can kind of
minimize the noise of everything
that's going around us. So
that's also I think, an
important an important part of
the demographic. They are
they're stressed, they're
overwhelmed. They constantly
feel like they're failing. I
know I'm just like repeating
some things, but that's okay.
Oh, you're okay, stressed,
overwhelmed constantly feel like
they're failing, a fearful that
their child is going to be an
entitled brat and spoiled,
fearful also, parents are feel
very fearful that they don't
have control of the child and
they don't have control of their
home. So parents get very testy
and feel, feel very strongly
when they believe that their
child is walking all over them.
I hear it all the time. I just
want to have control in my home.
And I remind them, we're not in
control, we're in charge. And we
have to switch our mindset.
I'm gonna address one her own
year itself. So we're not in
control. We're in charge. One
thing you dress which is really
powerful and from the messaging
standpoint, and I didn't put it
in language yet, but is
identifying what societal norms
are, and then Introducing the
new way to think about and to
break You know, existing beliefs
and myths to take a stand for
like, society teaches you this,
but this is the correct way. So
take it. I get it teachers Yeah.
What would you say are those
main societal norms and myths
that society teaches you that
children are to be submissive
and are not equal to parents.
Society teaches you that in
order to raise respectful kind
children, that you need to beat
them, yell at them, threaten
them, punish them, break them,
consequences break their wills.
That is what society teaches you
about the child parent
relationship, breaking the
child's spirit, really, if a
child is testing your boundary,
it's because they're
manipulative. This is this.
Another thing that society says
the spirit of the child is
manipulating you, even though
the research is incredibly clear
that children don't even have
the brain structures capable for
manipulation until they're about
seven years old.
And then you break their curse
stops it. Oh, my Yeah, that's
how we're like, Alright, let's
get to seven. Yeah, you want to
deal with that? Five, and then
you got to live from there,
dude after that.
Another one, another one. Yeah,
you shouldn't speak respectfully
to a child, because that will
make them soft. Noticing, and
responding to a child's emotions
is not what the world does. So
you shouldn't do that. Because
that will make them soft.
Yeah. Or if you give it or if
you give in and you give them
attention, then you're just
going to spoil them,
like you treat boys versus how
you treat girls. Yeah, there's a
lot of different social norms
around, it's okay to do they're
like, you want to raise a strong
boy, and you want to raise a
nice girl.
And also that if they have big
feelings, or if they misbehave
than they are to be put in
isolation. And then they have to
like, think about what they've
done, even though they have no
idea why they just did it, or
write it out on their own.
And it's because they're bad.
Because kids, because kids act
bad. And our job as parents is
to, you know, make them act
good. So it really is about
being in control of the child,
but we are supporting and
furthering the conversation
around a more conscious approach
to raising children, that
actually, there's quite a bit
that they can teach us. And our
job is to listen, and to support
not to always be controlling.
Because the truth is, is that
code control is an illusion.
You're not in control. These
are, these are human beings
with, with intentions and their
own lives to live. That's
another thing I would say
society does not look at
children like they are human
beings. They look at them like
they are possession. Even in the
way we talk about the my child.
We talk about them in a
possessive way. Now I'm, I will
still I'm not gonna go that that
far. say we can't call the my
child. They do. But like, we
have to kind of expand this,
this idea around, do who do they
belong to? We belong to
themselves first. And we're
supporting that.
And then what at what happens
when you take possession of them
is that you place your ability
or your how well you are as a
parent into how they act. So
like everything that they do is
all of a sudden now tied to
their behavior and your like
your worth as a parent.
So if they act like a good kid,
then you're like, I'm a great
parent, if they act like a bad
kid, then I'm a bad parent.
Exactly. A child's worth is tied
to their behavior. And the main
main crux of this entire
teaching that we're doing is
going beyond the behavior and
seeing and responding to needs.
I actually hear parents say, I
don't think my kid needs
anything. I gave him food. What
do they need, they just need
attention. That's another one.
They just need attention. We
have to flip that narrative
actually what they're needing is
connection. And this is an A
human need, that we all have.
And it's COVID has taught us
anything. It's that being
disconnected is deadly. We
preach it.
Okay, so let's let's kind of put
a quick bow on just the section
alone. You've already been
hitting on some of these other
pieces and some of these we just
swiped from your your sales
page, website, but really what
we're doing Not is like what is
the overall narrative or story
that we're taking your customers
through. So the more clearly you
can understand them, which we
do, and what they want. So I
want to raise it a wonderful
child, but I'm mixed messages.
So like, raising wonderful
child, what are some other
dreams that like deep down in
their soul? What is it that they
want, they want
peace, they want joy they want
in their home, in their home, in
their home, peace, joy in their
home, they want to feel like
they can, there, they're
successful with all the
messiness and the chaos, of
having children, we are not
sending the message that you're
going to have perfect home,
we're sending the message, you
can manage it. Even when it's
hard,
I think they want children that
are going to be successful in
the world, like they you know,
they're going to do such a great
job raising their children that
when they go out into the world,
they know that they can survive,
and they'll have a resilient and
be empathetic and be citizens of
society.
I also think that they really
want to feel connected to their
children, when I really get into
it, in my assessment with
parents and children.
Practically every parent who
ends up coming to me for a child
with behavioral issues, will
say, what I really want is to
better understand my child and
to know how to help them. I
don't know how to help my child.
And I think that is, that is the
dream of every parent, every
parent wants to know how to be
the best source of support that
they can possibly be for their
child, knowing that I'm not
going to do it perfect, I'm
going to make mistakes along the
way. But boy, I just want to do
the best that I can for this
child. That is what I really
think the vast majority of
parents want. We're hitting it
in the first five years, because
we know from a research
perspective, 90% of the brain is
developed by the time we're
five, we know from from from the
attachment literature, that how
we attach to people, if we learn
a sense of security, or
insecurity, or avoidance or
whatever is in our body, it's in
our central nervous system by
the time we're 12 months old.
And we also know from the
literature, that the more
accurate, can regulate and
reflect the better outcome this
child has for the rest of their
lives, including the teenagers
mean, everyone says, you know,
we just wait for the teenagers,
but this whole working with them
as when they're toddlers, this
is like a big transition like
the teenager. So we're really
focusing on prevention and
keeping that connection. So when
they do want, you know, get
introduced with all those wild
hormones that they have a sense
of regulation and a sense of
connection to you. And they
won't necessarily like do things
behind your back like I did, you
know,
also have the tools, you're
giving them the tools now. So
that when so we're giving them
the building blocks and the
tools through this program
during these young years, so
that when they hit those ages,
this is why we use the word
relationship down. Because what
we are training and teaching
are, we're giving the foundation
of a relationship in these early
years, that even though it will
shift and change as the children
get older and more independent,
this will be the foundation that
has been learned between this
particular child at this
particular parent, it is what
that child will fall back on
when they do want to be, you
know, a explorative and curious
teen and experiment with things
and do the typical teenage,
teenage things. What my friend,
my my most of my friends are
like, you know, 20 3040 years
older than me, what we did
exactly the same thing as you're
doing with your child. And what
we are learning is, it did make
a difference. We did have more
peace, we did have more calm in
the teenage years, the parents
who are focusing on getting the
children to sleep through the
night, the parents who were
focused on how their child was
eating and was obsessed with
that or getting their children
in did X, Y and Z activities.
Those parents had less joy felt
more stress and were more
disconnected from their, from
their, from their teenagers. So
while we're not necessarily
speaking to teenage parents, we
know from research and anecdotal
evidence that this is the way to
having those types of healthy
relationships that we desire.
That's so good. So problems, I
feel like we've covered that we
can kind of translate some of
these pieces down here
perspective. I do want to
address this real quick and
we'll expand on a few additional
ideas. But what is the One
belief that these parents need
to develop, in order to feel
confident that the raising
children you will like system is
what they need to be more
successful parent and deepen
that relationship with their
children. In order for someone
to buy into raising children you
like in this system, they need
to believe something. So they
need to believe, hey, I can be
successful with, you know, like,
it's just, it's kind of just
recrafting some of the language
but it's like, I can be a
successful, more loving parent.
When I would say maybe like,
implement the raising children
you like a system, or it but
it's more of a like an inner
belief, right? Like, you
reference some options up here,
we can kind of look at when I
believe that I'm not in control,
but I'm in charge, or when I
believe that in order to raise,
like, more successful children,
or children, like, I need to do
this, it's, you know, what is
that unique belief that breaks
societal norms, and limits that
helps you guys stand out what
makes you different,
there's so many, I'm trying to
kind of just distill it down to
something more overarching,
because I feel like, like, the
needs would be a good one. Like,
when I can understand my child's
needs, like I will see a shift
in their behavior, or I'll you
know, like, I'll understand how
to support them better through
all their years. But it feels
like if you don't know what
child's needs are, I'm not sure
that that that's strong enough,
you know, but
it's like, well, when I
understand the underlying reason
for my child's behavior, then
I'll be able to teach them about
their own emotions with which
will make them resilient people.
Maybe it has to do with their
thought and emotions, like when
I can understand I have the
power in me. You know, like,
it's given the self confidence
as a parent. Yeah, that's
what I was thinking, how do we
promote the good parent, I can
be a good parent, by centering,
love, and connection, and
listening
at the idea that you were
saying, like, parents feel that
they they're the ones to blame,
you know, so it's like reversing
that. When I understand that,
like, it's, it's not my fault.
I'm kind of used is the start of
the sentence I can be. Is that
early? Um, I would speak to,
like, you know, deep down, it's
kind of the part of that dream
element, right? where it's like,
like, I believe I can raise
wonderful children who are
successful, feel loved and
connected.
I can raise loving, and
respectful children without
hitting. yelling, yeah. Oh,
yeah. without hitting and
yelling, hitting,
yelling, and listening to what
society tells me is the right
way, or something like that.
Something like that. Yeah, I can
speak for myself as a parent to
me, as a four year old, I can
believe I can raise wonderful
children who feel loved and
respected. And there's some
continuation there.
believe I can raise wonderful
children. Who, how about who
fell in love? Who Fell in love
and connected without me
feeling? Like? Yeah, without me
feeling like a failure or
without me feeling taken
advantage of. Right?
Oh, yeah, we used to use like
without them, like running the
roost or something. But yeah, we
can say in a different way. But
like, we can support our child
in this way without them
being because that's really
this, this perspective plays on
societal as ideas, as well as
big fears. People have big fears
that their children are going to
run the show. And that's very
scary for parents. Good. Okay.
So
let's, let's keep going with
this. There's a few other things
on address, the next 20 minutes,
a big fear is that children will
run the show. So the plan that's
already kind of built in the
raising children like system,
one thing I want to kind of
address real quick is adjusting
the language. On the website.
It's the online course system is
what's used. But I think coming
from a parent's perspective, the
system and online course, is a
less attractive way of having
something that I want to join
and be part of experimenting
with words that will connect
with your ideal customer could
be like transformative learning
experience, something that is
draws you in a little bit more.
And it may be called that can it
be called transformative
learning experiences? That's
awesome.
That's huge, right? It's
speaking to the transformation
they can have as a parent, but
also the transformation they can
bring your child but then it's a
learning experience versus like
oh a system
Yeah. It'll be much easier for
me to sell this with my swipe
up. Right? Like, come join this
learning experience, as opposed
to sign up for my online course
guys, which nobody wants to sign
up for. But if it's a learning
experience yet, not yet, don't
worry. Well, we're almost at
10,000. We're getting there.
Yeah, yes.
Yeah. Yeah, well, completely.
And that's it. Like, it's all
thinking about, like, you know,
what is like you're inviting
them into a story that's about
them. And that's, that's one
thing to always remember. So. So
there's that plan there pay off.
Those are those outcomes, you
guys are already, like, hit on
so many. So well, like you
mentioned a few here minimize
tantrums. You know, it goes even
beyond that, though. So we we
kind of swiped those. And then
the ones up here with the dream
we can bring down here to pay
off other pieces, just so you
know what it's going to be used
for. So the problem solution and
payoff, which is basically what
we're swiping from above, we
want to narrow down on like,
what is that one problem? What
is that one solution? What is
that one payoff? Obviously,
there's so many examples. But
like if we can sum up these 20
problems into one problem, that
can be the most powerful,
because then what that can
translate into is your one
message message statement. So
that's like one, one to two
sentences. How can you talk
about what you do? And why in a
powerful way that attracts your
perfect customer? Oftentimes,
what people are gonna say, it's
like, hey, what does your
company do? Like, what do you
guys sell? What are you gonna
do? You're like, Oh, it's an
online course for parents to be,
you know, better parent, you
know, like, better parents or
children and people like, Oh,
that's nice. But how can you use
language that helps you stand
out, that's like, Oh, my gosh,
like, tell me more, you know,
like, this is for me or someone
with this as for and so that's
kind of where that power comes
in with giving the clarity of a
more of a power statement in
your Instagram stories, or in
your marketing messages
anywhere, you know, it can show
up and it stands out to people
belief statements. So this is a
big one, it kind of addresses
what we started talking about it
before with perspective. But
having just a series of belief
statements that's like, shows
what you're taking a stand for.
We're against societal norms.
We're against what like the
myths of the media are telling
you. And this is what we
believe. So like, we believe
that parents can be successful
in raise children, they love
your children, they like by
doing this by doing this. So
like, developing now, we believe
that parents are always good,
even when they make mistakes.
And then I would say the same
thing. We believe that children
are always good, even though
they make mistakes. That's the
goodness is really important. In
this program, I really like
that. We believe that healing
our I'm calling them connection
wounds, but you can change that
language if he's like, we
believe that healing our
connection wounds, is what leads
us to deeper, maybe more
meaningful relationships with
our children. And then I think
what I said before, we believe
that parents are in charge, not
in control.
And then we believe that parents
can feel successful at the end
of the day if they focus on
connection with their child.
So I hope this was helpful. And
you got a lot of personal
insight into your business by
watching this sample this real
life example of message
clarification. Again, there is
access to the story supply
guide, the PDF guide down below
in the description. And if you
like this content, make sure
again to like and subscribe
follow along on the journey and
we'll see you on a future video.
